Jezebel reports: If you like RHOA, then you will like this issue, in which NeNe Leakes says: “Kim’s a racist… I don’t like people who talk like that.” And Kim Zolciak says: “The reason I am not friends with [NeNe] is because she physically put her hands on me. She has an anger problem and is jealous.”
Me-ouch. In between the middle school hijinks, you’ll learn that Kim’s storyline is being phased out of the new season and NeNe is back together with Gregg. Moving on! Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer have welcomed twins: a boy and a girl. The names have not been released, but we’ll assume they are not Bill and Sookeh. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez just broke up but he is “already texting other ladies constantly,” which doesn’t seem that scandalous for an 18-year-old rich kid?
In sad sad sad news, the story about poor Ariel Winter from Modern Family is sad: She’s only 14, and her mom, Chrystal Workman is “a nightmare,” a source spills, adding that Workman has “screamed at her in front of the cast and crew” and tells Ariel she’s fat and needs to lose weight. Did you hear that Workman was “sexualizing” Winter and wonder, what the fuck does that mean? Well here’s what it means: It means that at the 2011 Emmys, the mom-approved dress Winter wore was big old cleavage-fest, despite the fact that Winter was 13 and wearing braces.
Sigh. In other news, Marissa Jaret Winokur lost 60 pounds by eating better and working out with a trainer and using an app called My Fitness Pal. She says the first 20 pounds were supereasy but weightloss is “hard” and “I do get cranky.” Finally, the most fun page in the issue is the one where you get to see what’s in Janelle Monae’s bag and learn that Zayn from Wand Erection has a crush on Rihanna.
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